10th March 2014: 5 simple steps to beat cancer : EXCLUSIVE
Sticking to five golden rules could be the key to beating cancer for good, new research shows.
I know this one! Is it eating more fruit-n-veg, getting exercise, not smoking, drinking sensibly, not being too porky and a sixth step which is not reading the Express?
The steps to take are quitting smoking, losing weight, exercising regularly, drinking less alcohol and eating more fruit and vegetables.
The first study to look at the effect of following all five rules had dramatic results. It found nearly half of all lung cancers would be prevented completely and the risk of tumours of any kind would be slashed by almost 20 per cent.
6th March: Fatty food is good for you.
I’m sensing a “but” here…
Fatty food is less damaging to your diet than sugar and carbs, say experts.
That’s not QUITE what the front page suggests, now is it?
The real culprits behind record levels of obesity and high rates of heart disease are carbohydrates such as pasta and bread – and sugar, claims a leading expert.
Well, yes, but this is now exactly news, is it?
“There is no conclusive proof that a low-fat diet has any positive effects. The literature indicates a general lack of any effect (good or bad) from a reduction in fat intake. The public fear that saturated fat raises cholesterol is completely unfounded [it] is worsened when fat is replaced with carbohydrate.”
How about the Last Parargraph Other Viewpoint Person Quote?
Professor Tom Sanders, head of diabetes and nutritional sciences in the School of Medicine at King’s College London, said: “Advice to avoid fatty meat products, choose reduced-fat dairy produce, and restrict cakes, biscuits and puddings, which are often high in saturated fat and sugar, and to select foods containing unsaturated oils such as nuts, fish and vegetable oils, remains good sense.”
5th March 2014: New way to fight agony of arthritis.
ANOTHER one? We have an average of one per month in ExpressLand. What is the latest cure? A pill? Some cabbage? A picture of a smiling child in a nice farenheit-y warm Summer field?
Positive thinking could be the answer.
I think my ideas could be just as valid, actually.
Tackling the way the mind deals with pain may be as effective as anti-inflammatory drugs for aching joints, it is claimed. Scientists suggest that meditation, talking therapies and counselling could help retrain the brain to reduce the chronic agony felt by millions of arthritis sufferers.
I am thinking poppycock.
Researchers looked at how the brain processes arthritis pain and concluded that “mindfulness” techniques could be better for some patients than costly and potentially harmful painkillers.
The study, published in the European Journal of Neuroscience, measured brain waves in response to short painful laser pulses to the skin in patients with osteoarthritic pain and those with no pain. They found that while anticipating the painful pulse, a brain area called the insula cortex increased its activity – and this predicted the extent and intensity of the patients’ own chronic pain. Prof Jones said: “All pain is in the mind. It is where pain is processed. What we need to do now is try to focus more on influencing the brain to prevent the pain.”
4th March 2014: Take statins to save your life.
They were dangerous last week but as Health Editor Jo Willey has been sent a press release about how great they are we can all love statins again!
Life-saving statins could be prescribed to millions more people under plans to slash heart disease deaths.
Could they? What how what when why what?
The proposal by drug watchdog the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence could also see more than twice as many people over the age of 40 taking statins to lower their risk of a heart attack or stroke.
They could? What do the doctors say?
The survey of 511 GPs also found that 55 per cent would not take statins themselves or recommend a relative to, based on the new risk score.
What do doctors know anyway?
28th February 2014: New pill to fight ageing: Drug is secret of a longer life.
Excellent news, a miracle cure for ageing! Nothing can stop us beating age once and for all!
That was the front page headline, what about the main story’s headline?
New pill to fight ageing: Could drug be secret to a longer life?
Oh bugger. The miracle drug has already been downgraded from a definite cure to a questionable cure. Next they’ll be admitting it’s yet another load of bollocks from a press release.
A pill that prevents ageing and keeps people heathier for longer is a step closer, scientists claimed last night.
How many steps remain?
A team at the National Institute on Ageing at the National Institutes of Health in the US has discovered a “promising strategy” to arrest ageing. They have found that activating a specific protein not only extends lifespan, it also delays the onset of age-related metabolic conditions such as heart disease and diabetes, and improves general health by lowering cholesterol and inflammation. The discovery centres on a protein called SIRT1.
OK, what were the results in the drug trials?
Drugs that increase its activity in the body have been found to slow the onset of ageing and delay age-related diseases in several animal models. Lead researcher Dr Rafael de Cabo said: “Here, we show for the first time that a synthetic SIRT1 activator extends lifespan and improves healthspan of mice fed a standard diet.”
Oh those poor Express Mice.
He added: “We are hoping in the long term to translate some of these findings into humans.”
The researchers found that the drug significantly extended the average lifespan of mice by 8.8 per cent.
This is of course totally a “secret of a longer life.”
26th February 2014: New way to end arthritis pain … a simple jab that has no side effects.
Yippeeee! Anotyher cure for arthritis! I have no grounds for cynicism , do I?
A powerful injection delivered directly into arthritic joints could slash pain levels for millions of Britons.
So it is not an end of pain bit a "could slash pain levels”?
How did the human trials go? Maybe this isn’t as flimsy as it appears.
The scientists said their work needs to be tested in patient trials.
I give up.
25th February 2014: Daily pill to beat diabetes.
Another cure for diabetes? We’ve had so many now.
Or is it?
No, of course it is not.
Diabetes wonder drug to be available on NHS in months.
Is it really?
A pill which slashes blood sugar levels and offers hope to millions of diabetes sufferers has been launched in the UK.
Where can we get it from, oh oracle of miraculous pills?
Experts say the drug, canagliflozin, which is taken once a day, is a vital new weapon in the battle against the Type 2 diabetes epidemic and its devastating complications. It reduces blood sugar levels in people for whom diet and lifestyle measures or other blood sugar-lowering medicines do not work well enough, say the manufacturers Janssen.
The pill has received a preliminary positive recommendation from the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (Nice) and could be available within months.
So it’s a pill that might help and it’s not got a release date? Sod it, let’s just cut to the Obligatory Final Paragraph Balance Quote.
Simon O’Neill of Diabetes UK said: “Developing new treatments that give people more choice about how to manage their condition effectively are really important and so we look forward to seeing the results of the Nice consultation.”
21st February 2014:
'Statins key to living longer' says the headline (once again. They often do this one)
So… the favourite miracle pill of Express Press Release Chief Jo Willey is back!
SUPER statins are the route to a longer life, slashing the risk of early death, according to new research.
The study, which examined data from thousands of UK patients, showed those treated with high-potency statins had a 28 per cent lower risk of dying within three years of their first heart attack.
Is that everyone? No, of course it is not.
Skip to the end… here’s the Bit Of Balance quote:
Amy Thompson, senior cardiac nurse at the British Heart Foundation, said: “Cholesterol-lowering medicines such as statins are an important part of treatment for many heart patients.These researchers have suggested that patients who are prescribed a high-potency statin after their heart attack have a better outcome. However, further studies are needed to prove this. If you are taking a statin and have any questions, ask your GP or pharmacist.”
No mention of the oft-reported horrible side-effects of statins in this article. How peculiar.
10th February 2014: Cure for common cold on the way.
A full house in Express Cover Bingo, what with the weather, foreingers and royal baby alongside the latest miracle cure. It is a cure, isn’t it?
New drug could put the block on cold virus. The headline on the actual story is slightly less concrete than the one on the front page, as per usual.
Scientists have developed a drug that can fight off the common cold, bringing hope of a cure a step closer.
So it can fight off the common cold? But is it a cure?
The compound, engineered by British researchers, could prevent millions from catching the virus by blocking its transmission to others and treat those who already have it.
We’re going to end up with a story about an idea that maybe could do something if another thing also maybe could do something, aren’t we?
It could also be used against potentially fatal illnesses including polio and hand, foot and mouth disease, which causes cold-like symptoms and, while treatable, has caused thousands of deaths worldwide.
Pigs could fly.
Researchers studied the structure of the EV71 virus, which causes hand, foot and mouth disease, and designed a compound that stops it in its tracks. The compound works by binding to the virus, paralysing it and preventing it from releasing the genetic material that causes infection. As a result, the drug could be used to treat the infection and, as a preventative measure, stop it from spreading. Scientists working on the study, published in the journal Nature, have tested the compound on other viruses closely related to EV71 – including the cold virus – and discovered it is effective against all of them.
This is becoming oh so familiar. What did the story’s boffin say?
The research is still in its “early days” and further studies will need to be carried out before human trials of the drug can begin.
So it might maybe cure the common cold in mice or something?
He said that if tests continue to give positive results he hopes it will lead to the development of a drug that could finally treat and prevent people catching colds. It could then be prescribed like the flu drug Tamiflu, which is given to those who are deemed at greater risk of the illness.
It’s an abundance of the "could."
How about the standard other person quote at the end of the article?
Neal Patel, of the Royal Pharmaceutical Society, warned that any anti-cold drug will only be a success if it has very few side-effects – otherwise doctors and patients are likely to shun it and soldier on with a cold instead. He added: “But something like the common cold, while it is debilitating and awful for a few day, is not something that is very serious for the vast majority of people.”
6th February 2014: Yoghurt is key to beating diabetes.
Hmmm…. is it? Is it really? Really the key to beating diabetes? Let’s see.
How low-fat dairy food can help to cut your diabetes risk.
So it’s not yoghurt but all low fat dairy and it’s not beating diabetes but cutting the risk? Not exactly looking like the front page is going to be accurate…
Eating a pot of yoghurt each day could ward off diabetes.
It’s an article by Jo Willey so welcome to the flimsy world of the “could…”
Low-fat dairy products cut the risk of developing the disease, new research claims. Regularly eating one pot of yoghurt can slash the chance of developing Type 2 diabetes by 28 per cent.
And other low-fat, fermented dairy foods such as fromage frais and cottage cheese reduce the risks of becoming diabetic by 24 per cent, found scientists from the Medical Research Council Epidemiology Unit at Cambridge University.
I am sure they did. Let’s all gorge ourselves on low fat daity at once!
Dairy products are significant sources of protein, vitamins and minerals. But they also contain saturated fat which can raise cholesterol levels and damage the heart and arteries.
28th January 2014: Diabetes cure within reach.
Another day, another cure. Oh well, at least they’re not being racist again. Let’s see how "within reach" this "cure" is…
Diabetes could be cured “within a generation” thanks to radical British-led research, a world expert claimed last night.
So one man claimed something could be cured within a generation? This is a shocking EXCLUSIVE!
What else did he say?
Dr Nick Oliver, diabetes consultant at Imperial College Healthcare NHS Trust, said: “There is a race on, that’s why what we are doing is incredibly exciting.” Asked whether the disease could ever be cured he added: “I really hope so. I am reasonably early in my career and there is lots of really exciting work going on behind the scenes. There are lots of avenues that will lead to potential cures for Type 1 and Type 2 diabetes and if I could see it in my career that would be incredibly exciting.”
One man says he would like it if diabetes could be cured in his career time. This in an EXCLUSIVE. What else did the diabetes boffin say?
“Diabetes can’t be cured at the moment. The race is on to get effective treatments for people. Their quality of life is important.”
Did we know that? I think we did.
How about the Obligatory Other Person Quote?
Dr Alasdair Rankin, director of research for Diabetes UK, said: “We think it is possible we could have a vaccine for Type 1 within 20 years.”
So, to conclude: If we all wish really hard then diabetes might be cured at some point. EXCLUSIVE!
27th January 2014: Laser cure for arthritis pain
The wheel of cures spins and lands on arthritis today. Hurrah for another cure for arthritis!
A revolutionary laser treatment can slash the crippling pain of arthritis, British scientists have found. The technique involves zapping sore joints with a powerful beam of light. It stimulates the same pressure points targeted in acupuncture – but using low-energy lasers rather than needles. Volunteers who had the treatment at the University of Dundee reported a significant reduction in pain and discomfort and an improvement in their quality of life.
So far , so good. This may be an actual cure…
In a report on their findings the researchers conclude: “Short-term application of low-level laser therapy, in association with exercise, is effective in reducing pain and improving quality of life.” Other studies have found lasers may help to promote tissue repair in damaged knees.
Not a cure after all. Shocked!
How does the Obligatory Final Paragraph Quote From A Different Source go?
Judi Rhys, of the charity Arthritis Care, said: “We welcome any good news that shows how people might ease the pain of osteoarthritis. This study has a positive outcome but, as always, the challenge is to ensure that once a new treatment has been identified it reaches as many people as possible.”
24th January 2014: Diabetes 'cure' to end misery of jabs.
I spotted the way ‘cure’ was typed immediately! This is not going to be any more of a cure than all of those other cures the Express have had on their front page, is it?
Potential diabetes ‘cure’ to end misery of insulin jabs.
Inverted commas 'cure' already downgraded to potential cure. Not looking good…
Health experts say that the artificial pancreas is as good as a cure because it means patients will no longer have to manage the condition themselves.
Cure now "as good as a cure" ….
Human trials are set to start in 2016 with the first implants taking place on the NHS within 10 years.
So they havenot even done any clinical trials for this cure / potential cure / as good as a cure?
“We are extremely close to embarking on clinical trials. Could the procedure to fit it be available on the NHS? Definitely – hopefully within a decade. Diabetes is already an epidemic and it’s going to soon become a scourge on society.”
Blah blah blah…
“After 20 years of research we are hopeful we have found a solution which has the potential to bring an end to the misery of daily injections for diabetics across the world within the next 10 years.”
Wot no cure? How about the obligatory final paragraph independent person quote?
Dr Alasdair Rankin, director of research at Diabetes UK, said: “This is one of several research projects looking at potential ways to make it easier for people with diabetes who use insulin to manage their condition. We look forward to seeing the results of clinical trials.”
22nd January 2014: New way to beat agony of migraine: NHS gadget ends pain for millions
Hurrah! Migrainers can beat their nemesis! But …. is the headline of the article going to be slightly less miraculous than the front page headline?
New NHS gadget to beat migraine agony by cutting pain down by 40 per cent.
"Ends pain for millions" does not equal "cutting pain down by 40 per cent.”
How does this gizmo work and is this just an advert?
In trials of the hand-held box, which sends magnetic impulses through the brain, sufferers reported that their symptoms had vanished – in some cases for the first time in decades. The cheap and simple-to-use portable device reduced attacks by almost 40 per cent.
The National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence (NICE) will today recommend the transcranial magnetic device is made available on the NHS for chronic migraine.
This is an advert, isn’t it?
The revolutionary machine is also available to rent for £150.
A spokesman for NICE, the organisation that issues guidance on treatments, said: “Doctors should put special arrangements in place if they want to use transcranial magnetic stimulation for treating migraine. The procedure should only be done by specialists.”
21st January 2014: Sunshine cuts blood pressure
The online headline is even more super:
Sunshine lowers blood pressure and slashes risk of heart attacks and strokes
People could slash their risk of heart attacks and stroke by enjoying more sunlight, say scientists. They found regular doses of ultra-violet light – UVA – help reduce blood pressure, a key trigger for both killer diseases. And the benefits of exposure to sunlight outweigh the risks of skin cancer, they believe.
They found UVA rays alter levels of nitric oxide in the body. This causes blood vessels to dilate and reduces blood pressure. Martin Feelisch, professor of experimental medicine and integrative biology at Southampton, said: “As blood pressure drops, so does the risk of heart attacks and stroke. It is a moderate drop, but we are talking about a chronic effect and a small drop in blood pressure regularly can be significant. In fact, we think the benefits of exposure to the sun far outweigh the risks from skin cancer.”
Time for the “Oh yeah but more studies need to be done, actually” quote from a proper human to round the article off as per usual:
Professor Jeremy Pearson, BHF associate medical director, said: “This small study suggests how the shortened hours of sunshine in the north of Europe may contribute to the known seasonal increase in blood pressure and risk of heart disease. Although this is intriguing, much more work needs to be done.”